Practical Magic 2, 2026.
Directed by Susanne Bier.
Starring Sandra Bullock, Nicole Kidman, Joey King, Maisie Williams, Xolo Maridueña, Lee Pace, Dianne Wiest, Stockard Channing, Solly McLeod, Ema Cavolli, Scarlett Nasrat, Harriett Scott, Liz Kingsman, Katy Wix, Nathan Foad, Diana Quick, Ava Galindez, and Cassie Bradley.
SYNOPSIS:
A multi generational family of witches, cursed to be loveless for centuries, attempts to break the spell by confronting dark secrets and sacrificing for each other.
Practical Magic 2 is practically garbage. Not that the first film from 1998 was heralded as a classic, but it probably doesn’t deserve to have its message of choosing to live life whether curses or real or not to be blindsidingly retracted, just so sibling sister witches Sally and Gillian Owens (played by returning Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman, respectively, but not before a truly uncanny valley awkward de-aging prologue setting up the present day) can more or less relearn the same lessons, this time with the former’s daughters Kylie and Antonia (Joey King and Maisie Williams) who have had all their memories of magic and witchcraft (terms once again used in the loosest sense of the definition in this series) wiped.
It turns out that Sally never got her happily ever after, as her husband died soon after, leaving her grief-stricken and swearing off her powers entirely, while also instructing Gillian to never tell her daughters about their gifts upon casting the memory spell on her daughters. Updated with jokes with modern technology as the punchline (such as the family curse of all men who fall in love with a woman of the Owens family meeting some tragic demise not being good for Tinder bios, or psychic links not necessarily being all-important in an age of digital footprints) that leave one cringing just as much as the rest of the hokey dramatic dialogue, this is a largely uninteresting story that should have been buried on the last page and written in the corner with a tiny font in one of those spell books.
To give one an idea of just how baffling and miscalculated the attempts at humor are here, this is a movie where Nicole Kidman pantses Sandra Bullock to prove a point that she is repressed and hasn’t felt the touch of anyone in a long time. Considering that it’s difficult to imagine that anyone was clamoring for a sequel to Practical Magic, one can only wonder if these admittedly still mega-popular stars lost a bet, bringing in director Susanne Bier (and a screenplay from Akiva Goldsman, Georgia Pritchett, and Kelly Marcel), taking over for Griffin Dunne for this legacy sequel.
Even the premise takes forever to establish: Kylie has fallen in love with Gideon (Xolo Maridueña), which spells disaster for him, unbeknownst to her. Given that Antonia works in the medical field and is an aspiring neurosurgeon, it’s reasonable to assume both daughters are young adults, which also strains credulity, since neither has fallen in love yet or experienced the curse. Granted, there is a throwaway line that they were regularly picked on in school for the bizarre behavior of their mother (did no one bother to tell them that dozens of people would come to their house seeking assistance through witchcraft after their memory was wiped?), we are talking about two Hollywood-attractive women who would surely have experienced some form of love by now. If one were to continue picking holes in the entire premise of this movie, they would be here all day, which is almost as long as Practical Magic 2 itself.
Nevertheless, on its own terms, the film is still a mess, and one hideously shot and lit like a TV commercial. Shortly after Kylie professes her love out loud, the next morning Gideon is hit by a car while crossing the street and sent into a coma in a slow-motion shot that elicits unintentional laughter more than an emotional shock. That’s also the extent of either of them as characters, as the story shifts to Kylie running off in anger at her mom for hiding the truth, and with an ancient book her kooky, macabre aunts (played by a returning Dianne Wiest and Stockard Channing) had been studying, possibly containing a stipulation to break the curse. Throughout this, Kylie also experiences hazy, ritualistic visions and is essentially called to London, where she hilariously makes sure to travel with an assortment of ravishing dresses despite the dire, urgent circumstances. An aside: those costumes and the elaborate production design of the Owens home and their garden are impressively crafted and deserve a better movie.
Meanwhile, Sally and Gillian are in pursuit, bickering along the way, which, like everything else here, isn’t remotely funny or engaging. However, Sally meets a practicing academic historian of magic (Lee Pace), who offers valuable information and a romantic love-interest subplot that, as mentioned up top, mostly serves as a redo of the first film (although the scenes between the two of them are the closest the film ever comes to passable character work). There is also a villain in all of this, played by Solly McLeod, who practices dark arts and has a connection to the family lineage, revealed in clunky fashion. There is no semblance of meaningful characterization here to make that matter.
That’s also not to say Practical Magic 2 doesn’t care about its characters. Oh, it cares about its characters, perhaps too much, tacking on an extended ending that goes on and on as if it is something out of Lord of the Rings. It’s one thing for the filmmakers and cast to revere these characters and want to deliver a thorough sendoff. For that to work, though, the previous 100 minutes need to give us something to give a damn about. Toward the end, there is a scene where Sandra Bullock’s Sally keeps repeating to her daughters that she loves them and is excited for tomorrow; it goes on and on and will no doubt induce a breakdown or two from those casting in futility a magic spell to make Practical Magic 2 end already.
Flickering Myth Rating – Film: ★ ★ / Movie: ★
Robert Kojder
